You want more sex than her? You're doing it wrong.

Let's get this out of the way: her libido isn't broken. Yours isn't superior. If you're the one always asking, always initiating, always getting turned down — the problem isn't her. It's the experience you're offering.

Most men confuse wanting sex with deserving sex. They aren't the same thing. Desire isn't a debt she owes you for being a decent partner. It's a response to how she feels — in her body, in her day, in your hands.

She's not low-desire. She's low-anticipation.

Women don't lose interest in sex. They lose interest in the sex they're actually having. Rushed. Predictable. Goal-oriented. Over in eleven minutes with a kiss on the forehead and a roll over.

Ask yourself, honestly: if you were her, would you be excited for what's coming? Or would you already know exactly how it ends?

The hard truth

Men with happy, horny partners aren't lucky. They're paying attention. They built a life — and a bedroom — she actually wants to show up in. They flirt at 10am. They listen at dinner. They take their time. They make her come first, second, and don't keep score.

That's not a personality trait. It's a practice.

What to do this week

1. Stop initiating sex for seven days. Initiate her — touch, attention, conversation, time. No agenda.
2. Ask her one real question: "What do you wish I did more of?" Don't defend. Don't explain. Write it down.
3. The next time you're in bed together, make it about her finishing — twice — before you even think about yourself.

Do that for a month. Watch what happens to who's initiating.

You don't have a frequency problem. You have a quality problem. Fix that, and frequency takes care of itself.